Sea Animals and Lingerie
by fuckshiru
Summary: Crossover story of PASWG and Spongebob. Why wasn't this made earlier. Anyways, I know I may have shoehorned some parts in but I have faith for it.
1. Chapter 1

40 years before Plankton took over Bikini Bottom, SpongeBob and Patrick would always manage their regular routine - SpongeBob would go to work and make krabby patties. Occasionally, an anchor would drop from the sky. Usually that anchor leads to the Flying Dutchman's ship. That's exactly what happened today.

Except it wasn't an anchor.

It was a really long pole.

"Squidward, the sky had a baby!" yelled SpongeBob.

"That's not a baby, dumbass! That's a pole!" Squidward replied back.

SpongeBob turned to Patrick's rock. "Patrick, the sky had a baby!"

"Wow! The sky is such a whore!", Patrick shot back.

Squidward was lucky. Usually when that happens, the anchor hits Squidward's tiki-house and smashes the windows. However, he was curious, too. He went to the top of his tiki. And when he did, he was hit right in the face with women's undergarments, falling from the pole. Squidward was furious, but not as much as he was annoyed!

"Well, I am going to give this pole-dropper a piece of my mind!"

Right when Squidward was hit in the face with another panty, he had a second thought.

"Oh, never mind - not touching that with a 3000 foot long stick"

Everytime something falls from the sky, Spongebob and Patrick are curious - really curious. So, they started climbing up the pole.

"Looks like that Flying Dutchman has a new ship" Spongebob said.

* * *

><p>When was afternoon, they were halfway up there. They had to be sure not to fall off.<p>

"Spongebob, why would the Flying Dutchman need an anchor?" Patrick asked.

Spongebob replied "I don't know. We have to figure that out".

* * *

><p>By evening, they made it to the top. It was then when they realized they were above water. But instead of drying up, they turned a little more blocky. Spongebob noticed he wasnt a Sponge anymore. His body had a blocky arms and stiff hands. He turned and looked at Patrick and Patrick had the same structure as him. Also, it looked nothing like a ghost ship. Instead, it looked more like a generic two-story house.<p>

"Maybe the Flying Dutchman was able to buy a house this time", Spongebob said to Patrick.

Patrick replied, "Let's go inside".

* * *

><p>When they were inside, there was literally nothing that resembled The Flying Dutchman. They looked around. Spongebob suggested that he might have changed personality entirely. They certainly didn't recall Flying Dutchman needing any STAIRS. As a matter of fact, they don't recall The Flying Dutchman needing anything that was in the house. But as usual, Spongebob and Patrick were curious. They went upstairs to see if they Flying Dutchman was sleeping.<p>

When they finally made it up the long set of stairs, they saw no clues of the Flying Dutchman. What they did SEE was a bunch of wet panties on the floor, and a box full of sex toys.

It was getting really creepy for the two. Of course they were still curious about what the Flying Dutchman.

Across the hallway, the saw a door...

Could that door lead to the Flying Dutchman? Well, when they entered it, the Flying Dutchman was nowhere to be seen.

But... there was SOMEONE in that room.


	2. Chapter 2

Who was in the room? Well the two sea animals were about find out..

In the room, there was a blonde woman. Though you can only see her hair, blocking the rest of her naked body.

"Hey! Hey you there" yelled Spongebob, tapping on the woman's shoulder

"Ahhhh! what the fuck!" the woman turned around and fell on her bottom! Then she took a look at Spongebob and Patrick.

"Are you the Flying Dutchman?" asked Patrick.

"NO, FUCK NO! How can be a FLYING DUTCHMAN when I'm not even fucking DUTCH or a fucking MAN"

"That's my friend, Patrick. He's just really stupid. Hey, since you're not the Flying Dutchman, what's your name?'

"My name's Panty... and you?"

"Spongebob" Spongebob said.

"Well, ''Spongebob"" said Panty in a mockingly tone..

"Since you're here..."

"and since I'M naked..."

"I think I'll have sex with you"

"Well, this "sex" thing sounds interesting. Though I never heard of it before." said Spongebob.

"Don't worry. You'll love it"

Then Panty took a look back at Patrick "Do you mind!?"

"Sorry" Patrick said, and he turned around covered his eyes"

Spongebob was laid out on the bed. Then Panty sat on his waist. "You seem pretty hard"

"Actually, I'm a sponge so that makes me soft"

"Ha ha ha!" Panty giggled "You're so funny! Keep talking. It's really sexy."

"Uhh OK.. I live in a pineapple and I love jellyfishing..."

Panty giggled and unzipped Spongebob's shorts...

Patrick with his eyes shut, could hear the blonde woman's loud moans of pleasure.

* * *

><p>The next day, Spongebob woke up and he realized that he was late for work. "Panty wake up! I'm late for work"<p>

But Panty wasn't in the bed. She was in her bathroom getting dressed. Spongebob got up, zipped his pants and ran downstairs.

Panty could hear the sound of Spongebob running down the stairs.

"Hey wait up!"

Spongebob turned and looked at Panty.

"Why are you in such a hurry, sexy?" asked Panty, who wasn't finished getting dressed.

"I need to go to work!" Spongebob said back.

"Where do you work? I can take you over there very fucking fast."

"I work at the Krusty Krab"

"And where is that?"

"In Bikini Bottom".

"The fuck is Bikini Bottom? A lingerie store?"

"No" Spongebob replied. "It's a city underwater"

"Wait, you live UNDERWATER? Holy shit!"

When Panty found out that Spongebob worked underwater, she was really confused. But she still agreed to escort the Yellow Sponge to his job.

* * *

><p>"I just turn into an angel and fly you to work..."<p>

"How will you do that?" giggled Spongebob.

"Just watch..."

Panty started doing some kind of chant that was too much for Spongebob to keep up with. Then, her attire changed into a white bra and a white skirt that resembled a stripper dressing up as an angel. And finally she grew wings.

"Awesome!" Spongebob shouted, clapping his hands. "So I guess you're going to take me to work"

Panty looked at him. "Sure. Just hang on to my back".

Panty floated up into the air and Spongebob climbed up into her back.

Then, they took off, right out of the window. Near the house was a river.

"I assume you want me to dive under that river"

"Yes please"

She took a nose dive under the river. The water had absolutely NO effect on Panty since she was an cute angel! She could she perfectly and she was amazed. Panty always thought that the underwater was just a full of weird looking fish. She was wrong,

While they were flying, Spongebob asked her something.

"Does this mean were friends?"

Panty giggles cutely, "yes, we're friends alright. Friends with benefits."

It wasn't long before Panty arrived near the restaurant that specifically read "Krusty Krab".

"You work here?" whispered Panty in a sexy tone.

"Yes, yes!"

"Before you go..." Panty puts her arm on Spongebob's shoulder "Why don't you give me some sugar" she turns her cheek to Spongebob's lips. He kisses her cheek, leaving a wet, soggy little lip mark.

"Buh-bye".

* * *

><p>When Spongebob went to work, he immediately yelled by Mr. Krabs!<p>

"Why are you late to work, fuck-o!?"

Before Spongebob could answer, Squidward, who was watching from the register did.

"Haha, he was probably busy banging that blonde girl".

"What the hell?" said Mr. Krabs.

"You know, that blonde that Spongebob was just making out with."

"Well Spongebob" Mr. Krabs turned to Spongebob. "You will work for overtime today, except that I won't pay ya extra, since you think having sex is more important than your work! Understood?"

Spongebob did a soldier's salute "Aye Aye, SIR!"

And he dashed into the kitchen. He was ready to do what he does best!


	3. Chapter 3

It is 6:00, and finally time for Spongebob to go home. It's also Friday, which means there is no work tomorrow. He was indeed, excited to see Panty, so as he went home, and sure enough, that pole was still there. So, that meant that Spongebob will spend his entire Friday night climbing the pole.

* * *

><p>Finally when it was 10:00 at night, Spongebob had made it there. This time he climbed extra fast so it wouldn't take long. He was so excited that his arms weren't aching from all the climbing. Spongebob enters Panty's house but another girl answers. She looks gothic and suicidal. She wears glasses and has her dark purple colored hair tied in a bun. However, despite looking deadly, she answers in a geeky voice.<p>

And his body form changed, like last time.

"Hiiiiiiiii" she smiles with her black lipstick "what do you need?"

Spongebob replies "Well, I'm looking for Panty. Sorry, I must be at the wrong house..."

"No, no... You're at the right place. Panty is my sister. You must be her friend, the Sponge."

"I sure am." Spongebob says "And what's your name?"

"Stocking, my name's Stocking!"

* * *

><p>Panty walks to Spongebob and greets him.<p>

"Where were you? Where do you work at? Why does it take you so long to come home" she laughs.

"I have to get up here. I'm a sea animal, remember."

Panty giggles again. "C'mere."

She hugs the Sponge and kisses full on the lips (and french kisses a bit, too).

Stocking turns around and says jokingly, "Can I have kiss, too"

However, Spongebob takes her serious and kisses her on the cheek.

Panty taps on Spongebob's shoulder, "Follow me"

"Where are we going?" Spongebob asks.

"Upstairs, silly. You were gone for a while and I can't wait to get my hands on you."

* * *

><p>Finally when they get upstairs, Spongebob lays on the bed. Last night when they had sex, it was a very exciting and relieving thing for Spongebob. And Panty takes off Spongebob's pants, but she changes her mind and decides she wants to have oral sex, specifically, a sixty-nine.<p>

"Lay down, baby" Panty says as she sits on Spongebob's face.

"Ewww! Why is your butt in my face?"

"Just pretend that I'm feeding you, OK"

Spongebob's only sight was Panty's ass. Where he could only smell the scent that reminded him of the smell of Jellyfish and flowers...

* * *

><p>Soon enough Stocking went home. She walks to her house, unlocks the door.<p>

"Patrick, I'm HOME!"

Patrick runs up to her. "I have to touch you!"

"Alright" Stocking says, extending her arms. "Come here".

The two hugged, very very tightly. Stocking kisses Patrick and some of her lipstick gets on him.

"I'm hungry for cake." said Stocking. "Are you?"

Patrick just stands there and drools.

* * *

><p>After a few minutes, Stocking walks slowly out of the room, bloated.<p>

"Ugh, I'm so tired now. I'm going to bed."

She walks upstairs, takes off her pants. She puts on an t-shirt (which is really tight because Stocking is so full)

When she turns around, she sees that Patrick is sitting on her bed.

"I guess someone is sleepy, too."

She yawns, lays down, and spreads her legs around Patrick, who is still sitting up.

"Lay down, dear" whispers Stocking. And Patrick did. He was sleepy, too.

Patrick rests his head on Stocking's chubby, soft, squishy breasts.

"Patrick..." She blushes and says "watch the boobs."

But Patrick was already asleep...


	4. Chapter 4

When Spongebob woke up the next day, he was next day. He gets up out of bed and stretches. He then puts his hand on Panty's back to wake her.

Panty smiles and giggles with her eyes closed.

"That tickles" she says as she wakes up.

And of course, Spongebob takes her seriously and starts to tickle her more.

"Tickle, Tickle. Tee-hee" said Spongebob softly.

Panty laughs and kicks her feet.

"Baby..."

Panty looks Spongebob in the eye. "I love you."

She puts both arms on Spongebob's shoulders. "I've had many partners. They all were horny teenagers. Especially this one dude named Brief. He was nerdy, geeky, cute and handsome. He was always so scared of everything. But I like.. I love YOU."

She kisses Spongebob on the lips.

"No man I even fucked was as funny as you. So... I've decided that I'll only have sex with you. Most of the time anyway."

Spongebob stands and Panty walks into her bathroom.

"And the next time we have sex, I won't use the pill."

After entering the bathroom... "On second thought, I'll use birth control"

Unlike most people who'd propose and ask for a marriage, Panty simply decides on a guy she will hang out with and have sex with a lot. And of course SpongeBob doesn't have a clue of what she's talking about. He thought it just meant they're best friends.

* * *

><p>Patrick sleeps with his face smothered in Stocking's mid section. When Stocking wakes up she was excited for breakfast. She always loved it. Since it was the beginning to the day it would give her an excuse to eat a lot. She puts on her glasses that were laying on her desk, goes to her closet and puts on a black shirt that had sparkly images on it and she puts on a purple colored button up long sleeves shirt over it. For her bottom she just put on leggings (since her old gothic outfit was out of style and no longer).<p>

She walks up to a sleeping Patrick and says "Wake up."

Patrick is still sleeping.

"Wake up baby"

Stocking shakes Patrick's back. But Patrick is still sleeping. Annoyed, Stocking grabbed a megaphone that was conveniently placed on her dresser and she shouts

"PATRICK, WAKE UP!".

Patrick finally wakes up, frightened by the loud noise.

Stocking puts the megaphone away. "I'm sorry baby, if I scared you. Gimme a hug."

"C'mon, put your clothes on. We're about to go to my sister's for breakfast. She makes perfect pancakes."

Patrick replied, "I don't wear clothes!"

Stocking looks at him mortified "You don't? Just those shorts?"

And Patrick nods his head.

Stocking was a little embarrassed since she realized that Patrick only has wore those shorts. She felt sorry for Patrick, but at the same time, she thought it was really sexy that Patrick only wears beach clothes everywhere he goes.

* * *

><p>Later, at Panty's house, SpongeBob, Patrick, and Stocking sat at the table.<p>

As Panty served them, she said,

"I have found myself a new friend with benefits."

She blinks at SpongeBob as she gives him pancakes.

"And there a lot of extras incase you people want it". She blinks at Stocking.

In a few minutes SpongeBob was already done. But of course, Patrick and Stocking were heavy eaters. Panty didn't eat at all she wasn't really interested. Even when Patrick was done, she still ate until she got full and bloated.

"Finally!" Panty says as she stood up and looked at Stocking.

"You feeling heavy? Lemme get that for you, sis."

Stocking belches as she stands up.

"Wow you really did a number, Stocking."

Right at the moment, one of Stocking's buttons fly off her shirt and it hits Panty in the eye.

She screeches "Oh shit!"

And she clutches her eye and rolls around on the floor.

"Are you..okay" Stocking says to Panty. But right when it seems like she was legitimately hurt, she got up and started laughing.

"Tee-hee. What's the matter..?" Stocking asks again.

Right then, she got up and starting tickling her sister on her bloated stomach.

"Ha-ha, that tickles... Why.. are you tickling me, sis?"

Panty ignored her and continued to tickle her and she doubled over on the floor laughing. She continues to tickle her and until she cries - not out of sadness - but out of laughter.

"Oh, stop it!"

And of course, SpongeBob and Patrick saw it. They both went along and started tickling her aswell.

"Hahaha! Why are all you doing this"

Neither Patrick or Panty gives them an answer, but SpongeBob gave the best answer.

"Because we're playful..."


	5. Chapter 5

After a few minutes, Stocking gets up off the floor from being gang-tickled on the floor. She was got down to her knees and started panting.

"So... what are we going to do next"

"Well" Panty says, looking at Patrick and SpongeBob "what do you boys normally do on Saturdays?"

SpongeBob replied, "We usually go jellyfishing and watch Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy episodes."

"Cool" Panty replies. "who's 'Mermaid Man" and "Barnacle Boy"?

SpongeBob says to her, "They're superheroes. We can even show you where they live. But you have to fly us."

"That'll be easy."

* * *

><p>After both of the sisters, did their transformations, both Spongebob and Patrick were hanging on to their backs and sure enough, neither of the sisters had any problem carrying them.<p>

"Am I heavy" Spongebob asked.

"You aren't heavy, you're sexy" Panty replies in the most cutest, adorable, sexiest voice ever. When she was an angel, she spoke on a voice that was good enough to even arouse Spongebob.

"Where exactly is this "Mermaid Man" and "Barnacle Boy"?"

Spongebob looks at her and says "they live in a retirement home."

"Oh, so they're actors."

"No" Spongebob looks her in the eye, although she was just as interested as he was, being the nerdy geek that she was.

"They're real."

"That's silly" Stocking says, confused. "Superheroes aren't real!"

"I'll prove you wrong!"

* * *

><p>Soon enough the drop by a centre labelled as "Shady Shouls".<p>

At the entrance, the same man who was always annoyed, was also surprised at the guests that Spongebob and Patrick brought with them.

"Holy hell!" he says. "Those gals belong to you?"

"Well, one of them said that we're friends with benefits" says Spongebob jokingly.

The two walk inside but leaving the man behind who was extremely confused..

Stocking was definitely interested. "So he has a lair, too. Like every other superhero?"

"You'll see for yourself.."

* * *

><p>The four were finally down there. A short man with a circular shaped body and a taller man with a thin figure were working on some sort of machine when they had the daylights scared out of them by Spongebob tapping on their shoulder.<p>

"SHIT!"

The circular shaped man, also known as Mermaid Man was startled by their appearance, but at the same time he was amazed at the two beautiful women that Spongebob brought with them.

The taller man, known was Barnacle Boy (though he looked way too old to be considered a "boy") scolded Spongebob for startling them.

"Goddamn it! How many times do I have to tell you not to do it!?" yelled Barnacle Boy.

"You could've gave us a heart attack..!"

But then they turned around and looked at the pretty, sexy angels that Spongebob brought with him.

"This is Panty! And the woman standing next to Patrick, here name is Stocking. Say hi Panty".

Spongebob takes her hand and waves it for her. However, Panty was never comfortable around old men. She would NOT have sex with a old man.

"Who are these wonderful ladies?" Mermaid man asks.

"They just told you their names you dumbass!"

"Oh well. Not like I'll ever have sex with them." He takes a look down at his crotch.

"It's been years since I actually had sex.."

"Speaking of sex.." Panty says.. "Do you want to go to your house and have sex?"

"Sure..."

"You too Stocking?"

"Yeah, sex sounds good."

The four walked away.

"Looks like the kid DOES have a life after all."

"Right, Mermaid Man."

"Mermaid Man."

Then Mermaid Man replied, "Who are you?"


	6. Possible bullcrap ending

A few hours later, SpongeBob AND Patrick were laid on their beds. But their ladies were nowhere to be seen. Instead they looked around saw some kind of.. red-like goey substance.

When SpongeBob awakened and noticed this, he immediately calls Patrick on his shell-phone.

"Patrick...!"

"Panty's not here anymore!"

"Patrick?"

It was clear that Patrick answered the phone but he stood there and drooled.

So SpongeBob quickly put on his pants, rushed out of the house and finally went over to Patrick's house. He saw that Stocking was no longer there.

"Patrick"

SpongeBob walks over to him and shakes him awake.

"Patrick, your girlfriend is no longer here anymore! Look!"

Patrick says confusedly "Huh."

"C'mon Patrick, lets go to the Krusty Krab"

"Maybe Mr. Krabs and Squidward can help us.

* * *

><p>"MR. KRABS MR. KRABS MR. KRABS!" both of them shout at the same time.<p>

"WHAT WHAT WHAT" Mr. Krabs shouts back.

"PANTY AND STOCKING ARE MISSING!" SpongeBob yells nervously.

It is then when Squidward interrupts.

"No, they didn't "leave" you dolts."

SpongeBob looks at him confused.

"You said you were "friends with benefits". She probably got sick of you..."

"because you're so fucking annoying!"

SpongeBob is still confused, so Squidward explains it for him:

"When you have friends with benefits, that doesn't always mean that they're going to be your soul mate!"

"It just means that they're your casual partner. That's it."

SpongeBob was a little less confused. He thought "friends with benefits" meant having a friend that would go jellyfishing with him, go to mermaid man and barnacle boy conventions, etc.

But still, he was pretty confused on why Panty and Stocking would just leave them in the middle of sex.

"But why would she leave me while we were having sex?" said SpongeBob, nervous about being scolded by Patrick.

"Maybe because your a jackass and she wanted out immediately." And Squidward added "Change your pants, too!"

SpongeBob takes a look at his pants. There was a stain of white cream on it.

Mr. Krabs hears about the nonsense that SpongeBob is spewing.

"Well, I personally think that was a good thing! Because that ladey was holdin you up from working."

SpongeBob realised that he has forgotten one of the most silliest things ever...

"Why did you show up late, boii?"

Mr. Krabs was very angry at him.

"Didn't you forget - we aren't closed on Saturdays!"

SpongeBob was completely embarrassed about that! And it was then when he realised that having a "friend with benefit" was a bad thing. It only kept him from work..

However, he was still confused on how Panty and Stocking disappeared.


End file.
